Team Tinies IDK WHAT'S HAPPENING

[weddingcupcake]

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[prebeard]

They're busy trying to solve it, you know.

[The last time Tokiomi complained about pain was when Kirei betrayed him. Since then, he's doubled his efforts to be calm and in control of himself at all times. He never makes a fuss about hardship, because it's always just a small obstacle in his pursuit of his wishes.

Even now, he does his best to be composed. He tosses and turns both in his sleep and in the delirious in-between state that's replaced the majority of "waking", but he never cries and never admits defeat. His breathing is ragged and shallow as a constant, and yet he grits his teeth through the worst pain and insists that he'll be fine. Of course it's a given that they'll figure it out. He can't accept impending death.

But occasionally he's hit with an episode that takes all his determination to weather. Waves of nausea and agony come at irregular intervals, each seeming worse than the last. His immovable elegance up to this point only makes it a sharper difference when the next one hits. He was reaching to give a reassuring touch, but it suddenly turns into gripping at Gil's sleeve, Tokiomi's face paling as he gasps and curls in on himself. This time, he can't help the drawn out whine -- or the hyperventilating that follows. All he can do is put his free arm over his face to try to hide the tears pricking at his eyes.]

[whoreofbabylon]

[He lets Tokiomi grip at him and watches, quiet and outwardly composed. If the episode worsens, he'll call for aid. If Tokiomi can weather it, then he'll stand watch. There's little else he can think to do - not when he feels terrified not so far underneath the surface.

Gilgamesh hates death. He reviles the fact that there is one thing in creation that he cannot conquer or command, and it has a nasty habit of finding the few he'd ever care to preserve. It's obvious in all his nervous energy, obvious to anyone who's read of his exploits, and he can't help but wonder how apparent his state of mind is to Tokiomi.

Of course, he cannot ask, especially not now. He'll simply remain here, scared but not daring to hide that fear by leaving Tokiomi's side; he has no intention of listening to another dear companion cry out from loneliness.]

If you must cry, then cry. There are great men who have shed more tears than you could imagine.

[prebeard]

[He doesn't want to cry. If he starts, he's pretty sure he won't be able to stop, and that's frightening. As long as he can keep it together, he can continue to convince himself that he's going to be okay. He won't die. He'll be fine, and it'll be like this never happened. He just has to stay calm and trust in his family to figure it out.

But it hurts. It hurts a lot, and to be honest he's really scared. He's afraid he'll go to sleep and he won't wake up, and he'll never be able to become the man he's always wanted to be. He'll disappear from existence -- and he knows that would be cruel to Gil as well.]

I'm okay...

[It's a lie, said in a voice tight with pain and exhaustion, but it's one he's determined to cling to.]

I'll be fine.

[whoreofbabylon]

I expect nothing less, Tokiomi.

[Ah, will he be honest? Not entirely; Gilgamesh is content in allowing others to know of his legacy. It is what makes him a hero, and it is what keeps Enkidu in this world.

But he will not speak of fear with his own lips. Not right now. So he'll couch it as something else.]

I determined you to be worthy - to succumb so early would do disservice to my judgement.

[prebeard]

Mm...

[He's quiet for a moment, concentrating on breathing until the pain lets up and he can go limp. Eventually he continues, in a near-whisper:]

I'm sorry for making you see such a thing again.

[whoreofbabylon]

Don't be stupid. In my time king and conqueror went hand in hand - I have seen suffering a hundred times over.

[prebeard]

You know what I mean.

[He is tired, he is in pain, and he's scared. That means he's a little snippier than usual. Sorry, Gil.]

[whoreofbabylon]

...my point stands. I would not dream of dwelling on such a thing now.

[Which is hilariously opposite the truth, but he'll say it anyways]

If you must apologize, do so by hastening your recovery.

[prebeard]

What will you do if I can't? [What will you do if I die?]

[whoreofbabylon]

[His patience is wearing thin - he's been running circles around that exact question and around his own memories enough as it is. To have it posed so plainly tries his patience for himself and his own insecurities.]

I'm not interested in entertaining thoughts of the impossible. If you wish for me to remain here you may simply ask, rather than stalling me with inanities.

[prebeard]

[He goes quiet for awhile, unsure of how to respond. There's no one else he can admit fear to. There's no one else allowed to see him crumble. But at the same time, he's afraid that doing so too much will backfire and leave rejected to the point of murder -- or worse, simply left alone.

He wants to shout at Gilgamesh to listen to reality. He wants to plead with him to allow a break in denial. He wants to hear that he won't be abandoned succumbing, even after he dies. But he doesn't know how to say those things and remain "elegant". He only knows how to stomp on them and think only of his goals.

Only his goals seem so distant now. Becoming anything but a corpse seems impossible when his body's weakening so quickly. And yet he can't bring himself to risk voicing his terror of that finality, so when the next wave of pain hits his emotions are wound so tightly that all he can do is suddenly, with only a gasp as warning, dissolve into tears.]

1/2

[whoreofbabylon]

[For a moment, he's stunned. Of course he said he'd allow for tears - and he meant that with utmost sincerity. Still, the suddenness and the perceived lack of a trigger for it is startling.]

[whoreofbabylon]

[But Gilgamesh eases after a moment and settles down beside Tokiomi. He isn't cuddly and affectionate anymore, that much has been more than apparent, but he doesn't have any desire to leave Tokiomi either.

So he switches on his DS and rests one hand on Tokiomi's shoulder]

[prebeard]

[He's not a loud crier. Even this low, he can't loosen up enough for that. But it's there and it's obvious and when his hand comes up to cover Gil's it's weak and trembling. He digs his nails in without meaning to, but he's lost the strength to do much damage.

Still, that weight beside him is reassuring. He's learned, in the last year, what this Gilgamesh is like. Being allowed to feel that presence so close and still is more acknowledgement than he can truly fathom. He's been elevated to the point of altering the rules of a legend, and he knows that. It's another reason he wants so desperately to cling to it.]

[whoreofbabylon]

[He silently allows Tokiomi to cling - the nails are no bother. Gilgamesh regards his mere presence as vast honor, and so he is content to simply sit in silence and play Pokemon.

A game about collecting a shitton of things to do your bidding? He considers this game absolutely made for him.

After an easy 15 minutes in which he allows Tokiomi to simply cry it out, he suddenly becomes very focused on the screen. Several more minutes pass, an intense expression of concentration on his face, before Gilgamesh finally gives Tokiomi a gentle shove and turns the screen towards him.]

I have found a suitable creature to name after you.

[prebeard]

[By that time he's calmed down significantly, as the combined physical pain and terror ebb. When he looks up his eyes are red and puffy, bright against his pale face.]

A creature...?

[Excuse him. He's not been paying much attention.]

[whoreofbabylon]

Observe.

[He's named a Vulpix Tokiomi. He's rather proud of himself - at the very least, it's a distraction.]

I intend to keep it by my side and train it into a fine companion. It is capable of setting its opponents ablaze, a skill that will prove most useful.

[prebeard]

[That's incredibly silly. There's just something ridiculous about an ancient Sumerian king playing Pokemon in general, let alone making such a thinly veiled gesture.

He's too tired to laugh about it, but as he leans sleepily against Gil's side, he does give a warm, soft smile. Horrible person as Gil may be to everyone else, Tokiomi still can't help but love him.]

You're so strange.

[whoreofbabylon]

It is not strange in the least. You must name your companions! I have learned that only fools fail to assign names and believe they can secure victory with a confused, undisciplined lot of six Magikarp.

[The King of Heroes is vehement about this point - and yet, his shoulders relax and he allows himself to slump lazily against Tokiomi.]

[prebeard]

Is that the floppy fish one?

[Tokiomi is still not good at the world outside his studies. He is, however, much better than he used to be. He has evolved from your grandmother who doesn't have a television to your mom who really does try the poor dear.]

[whoreofbabylon]

That is the one. It's no wonder that can do little but splash and struggle, their trainer cannot issue proper commands to them. I assure you, your namesake will not be handled so irresponsibly. As king, I will not only conquer, but cultivate.

[prebeard]

You'll complete it in no time, I'm sure.

[He mutters, amused and sleepy all at once. The pain's subsided for now, giving way to exhaustion. This position is warm, comfortable and safe. No matter how much either of them has changed, all Tokiomi has to do is close his eyes and he's right back ten years ago, small and full of wonder and happiness with his Saber curled up beside him.

It's enough to combat the hopelessness of this illness, and he's beginning to fall asleep.]

[whoreofbabylon]

Naturally! I am already the very best.

[The weariness in Tokiomi's voice catches his attention, and for a moment he's concerned all over again.]

...do you require rest?

[He needs the reassurance that Tokiomi will wake up again. Only then will he allow sleep.]

[prebeard]

Just a little...

[He's a bit afraid to close his eyes himself. But he needs to take care of himself, and he's sure he can hang on another day or two at least.]

Will you stay?

[whoreofbabylon]

If that is your request, then I suppose I will grant it.

[Yes, in other words.]

This position is comfortable enough, anyways, though I may stir you if I choose to move.