You can admire me if you want, but the truth won't change. I failed you, didn't I?

[That's the heart of things, right now. Everything else is just background fuzz. He doesn't want to argue about his whole life, anyway. That's years and years of trying and faking and slipping and watching people get hurt or die because he couldn't follow through in the end. What's really bothering him -- what's making him start crying again now, is that it's just so unfair for Mikado to say nice things about him, when he's sitting here hurt, scarred, because of Kida's failures.

It makes his throat hurt and his chest ache, and he has to drop his head into his hands to try and steady himself enough to keep from simply melting down. It's just not right. It's not fair at all.]

You were my most important person and I didn't protect you at all...