[Yep he's a nice friend like that. Water for you, kid.]
...I told you I had a gang in middle school. We were just dumb kids, but it kind of got over my head after awhile. Y'know, I tried to keep it really small time, but things got violent anyway. We had a rival group that was bigger and older than us. That's when I met Izaya, through a girl. It was all his set-up, but... I loved her. And then she got hurt, because of the fighting. Because I failed to protect her. So... Actually, I invited you to Ikebukuro so that I could run away from that whole life. I left the gang, and her, and traded it for you, and then Anri too. But the whole time, I was just pretending. All that playing around, hitting on older women and being loud... I was lying. I wanted to be happy and normal, so I faked it. I just thought I should act like the kid I'd been in Saitama, and if I tried hard enough that life would really become mine.
Really, I've never done anything but bullshit, ever since I came to this city. Being Lucky was just a choice to throw away the parts of me that weren't needed and force the parts that were, because I wanted to help people. I faked it til I made it. So it shouldn't be so surprising that it's fallen apart. The real me has always been... this. Just a failure and a liar.
no subject
...I told you I had a gang in middle school. We were just dumb kids, but it kind of got over my head after awhile. Y'know, I tried to keep it really small time, but things got violent anyway. We had a rival group that was bigger and older than us. That's when I met Izaya, through a girl. It was all his set-up, but... I loved her. And then she got hurt, because of the fighting. Because I failed to protect her. So... Actually, I invited you to Ikebukuro so that I could run away from that whole life. I left the gang, and her, and traded it for you, and then Anri too. But the whole time, I was just pretending. All that playing around, hitting on older women and being loud... I was lying. I wanted to be happy and normal, so I faked it. I just thought I should act like the kid I'd been in Saitama, and if I tried hard enough that life would really become mine.
Really, I've never done anything but bullshit, ever since I came to this city. Being Lucky was just a choice to throw away the parts of me that weren't needed and force the parts that were, because I wanted to help people. I faked it til I made it. So it shouldn't be so surprising that it's fallen apart. The real me has always been... this. Just a failure and a liar.